A sad experience with someone I care about

For writing we were writing a narrative story that has actually happened in you life. I chose "A sad experience with someone I care about". You had to make a mini plan, plan, write intro and your story. Here is my mini plan:

Protagonist- me

Characters- -mum, dad, uncle#1, uncle#2, aunt, aunty,grandma,
grandpa,me, sister, brother, cousins.

Plot- grandpa passing away.

Setting- my house, hospital

Conflict - leaving us alone.

We did our plan in our literacy book. We wrote our hamburger plan. Unfortunately I can't take a picture. So I will get on to show my writing.

A sad experience with someone I care about

Intro-

We went to Hokitika for a holiday. We came back after spending a night at my aunt’s house. We went on Saturday and came back on Sunday. After we came back grandpa went to bed to rest after travelling so far. My sister was also in the room where grandpa was. He was sleeping. Suddenly my sister heard someone talking. She looked around. She asked, “ Grandpa is that you?” It  was grandpa!. He was talking to himself. My sister woke him up he said he was fine. Suddenly he started breathing heavily.

My sister ran to call grandma. Grandma ran in and saw grandpa breathing heavily. She shouted, “ Sons come here and look at your father!” They quickly called an ambulance.

The doctors checked him. As he was getting checked he was asked several questions. He kept saying he was alright. But he was rushed to the hospital in the ambulance. Aunt went with grandpa in the ambulance followed by dad, grandma and uncle.

He was admitted in the hospital. He was scanned, x-rayed, dripped etc. When the reports from the scan came the  doctors told us he had an major heart attack. He had cancer spread all over his body which caused a major heart attack after the attack the heart stopped pumping and grandpa stopped breathing. We all cried and cried. His funeral was the next day. All our relatives came to his funeral. He was the best grandpa in the world we still miss him.

If you like my story please comment and tell me also if I made any mistakes.